(This is supposed to be taken lightheartedly by the way)
LEOPARDS CAN’T CHANGE THEIR SPOTS: You cant change a guy - from the more trivial (depending on your viewpoint) - he’s not going to stop farting in bed - to the downright awful - once he’s cheated he will not stop if you take him back. He won’t wake up one day with the ability to keep his trouser snake inside his trousers having failed several times before. Either accept the way he is and your despicable treatment because you ‘LOVE’ him (for some foolish reason) or kick his ass to the curb. Easy choice.
ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS: Let a man use actions instead of his mouth - don’t listen to false promises. I.e “I want to spoil you with X Y and Z..” “I want to fly you around the world.” “I’ll treat you like a princess, you will never want for anything again.” How many times have you heard this from a man and it actually materialises? Men who want to do all these things don’t announce it again and again in order to brainwash you into thinking these things will eventually come. Well guess what? After 4 months has passed and there is not a hint of spoiling - they won’t! By the way if Prince Charming exists he is probably not a handsome man with a dazzling smile and remarkably believable and romantic promises. He is more like the frog in the fairytale - some ordinary guy - average at best - working in an office cubicle maybe even with super thick geeky glasses and a stutter who you wouldn’t give the time of day to, and nor would any woman above a 5/10 either.
TOO MUCH SELF LOVE IS SELF DESTRUCTIVE: Confidence and self belief are wonderful in small doses. Confidence is often reported to be the key to success, professionally and one could say regarding love. No woman wants a man who shakes when he speaks to her or lets her walk all over him. We want cahonas and a certain amount of arrogance is acceptable, whether you are aware of that fact or not. When someone is arrogant we subconsciously accept that they possess some quality worthy of arrogance and we respect them more.
However arrogance becomes very unattractive if it is displayed too much. Have you ever dated a man that looks in the mirror more than you? I am sure you were uncomfortable with this, as was I. It is simply NOT natural and one could say it is in fact a feminine trait. Have you ever dated a man that loves the sound of his own voice? Over promotes himself? Tells you how wonderful he is day and night? Brainwashing….sound familiar?
Anyway back to the point. The point I was trying to make and got carried away in the process - when a man loves himself so much and thinks he is the be all and end all and knows everything and no one can tell him different - he will never give you the level of respect you deserve. Stay away girl stay away!
SIMPLE RULE: HE DOESN’T HAVE TIME, THEN DON’T GIVE HIM ANY! : When someone shows that you are not a priority don’t make them yours.
HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU: You can tell VERY early on if a guy is really into you or not depending on the first date. It might seem obvious but if he invites you to his place or invites himself over then he is probably expecting you to be ‘casual’ during your first so called ‘date’. If you are cool with that then fine. But 99% of men don’t wish to have a second encounter of any type after a first date shag, just a warning.
If for some weird and inexplicable reason he really DOES just want to ‘hang out’ at yours or his and has nothing freaky planned then ask yourself if he doesn’t make an effort to begin with then why would he make an effort later? If you accept this it falls into a routine. Can you really handle spending such ‘exciting’ quality time like this?! (ALL the time). You’ll be playing bingo together within a year.
On the other end of the spectrum - if he tells you he loves you after a few days do not believe it! You can safely conclude that he is definitely NOT thinking about marriage and having babies with you and living happily ever after in the countryside with your 2 goldfish, 5 dogs and 9 cats - .he has some sinister ulterior motive, the most likely being he just wants a shag. Don’t humour him or wait it out - embarrass him by laughing (long and hard preferably with a few snorts thrown in for maximum effect) at him for his foolish move.
PHONES AREN’T WATERPROOF - If he says he’s going to have a shower and his phone has mysteriously disappeared from his coffee table - what bigger warning do you need? Mind in the early days it is not as worrying than if your relationship has long been established.
Calls/texts late at night he acts strange about are also a giveaway. If he’s naturally nocturnal, his friends are too and he acted like it wasn’t a big deal then its probably not. But if he acts shifty/leaves the room then you know something’s definitely up. Like DUH.
CONFUSED GUYS ARE CONFUSING SO DON’T CONFUSE YOURSELF - A confused guy is useless - he will never make up his mind. Wouldn’t you rather be with someone who you know is sure of his feelings for you? Realise your own self worth - your time is precious - don’t waste it with some loser who doesn’t know how lucky he is.
You’ll find him aged 89 rocking on his chair on the porch STILL scratching his head over the trivialities of egg versus bacon for breakfast. Guys who don’t know what they want never do. They think they do, perhaps for several years but then change their mind again. *KICK*
A REAL MAN HAS COHANNAS - A man that wont stand up for you is also useless! What kind of man does he call himself? He’s as good as a post-op tranny (no offence trannies, hope you understand my point).
HE JUST WON’T GROW UP: Simple and sweet: After 25 men do not mature anymore! They stay that way forever. Imagine said subject EXACTLY like that 50 years from now but more wrinkly, more ugly and more irritable, and in aid of Viagra to function. Terrifying prospect. Imagine this before you say your vows!
YEAH HE CAN’T COOK BUT HE CAN WATCH - OK this is not a negative point. GASP- YES, I am capable of making some nice comments towards men.
A man that watches you cooking and keeps you company while you do it is a diamond, it shows how much he appreciates you cooking for him. Instead of a man that sits on the couch watching TV farting and picking his nose while waiting for his slave to return from the kitchen with his 3 course feast.
Add your own pointers, share your horror stories and maybe we can gather with pitchforks and...
:P
oh yeah men feel free to defend yourselves or agree!
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